elanya

It's all so complicated. Too much to write coherently all at once, especially at this time of night. I know what you mean about some of it at least though, like what does it pay to pretend. It isn't necessarily pretend though, and sometimes you just have to take what you can get. I found, for myself at least, that talking with someone who is willing to listen, really listen, does have value even if you don't see a 'resolution.' The talking itself helps you to sort things out in a way that simmering them on the back burner of your brain just doesn't seem to accomplish. Sometimes they can help you see things you never thought of before, just by asking questions or whatever, which might help you pin down where the feelings have been coming from. Even if you can't eliminate them (or not right away, anyway), that understanding is an immense help. I know that I have told you all this before as well. Nothing new.

I know that I don't have to tell you to take care of yourself, right? Have good food, don't abuse yourself, and don't eat nothing but carny food all day like I just did. Although this Kernels corn is really, really good...