elanya

I am full of unreasonable amounts of bile. I blame the bees. They are making me want to cry and kill tihngs. It's a vicious cycle. I have nothing to cry about, so it just makes me want to kill things more. I have no things to kill, this makes me sad...see?

I am full of unreasonable resentment, for a million different unreasonable things. I feel like I have a lot of my priorities skewed right now. I'm feeling petulant and bitchy. I'm also in the kind of vile upset mood where I'm not sure if I'm even capable of expressing myself verbaly. It's either like and fake things, or be incapable of speech.

Im tired but I can't nap, I never can anymore. I don't have anything to do that seems fun, even though there are options opren to me that would (or at least should) normally be pretty appealing. I have new things to read and dragon warrior all to myself. I also have a fiancee who is probably free tonight, but I am afraid to call him because if he isn't, it will only make me more unreasonably angry and also because I am afraid I will only have mean things to say to him regardless.

Now, I say this is bees, but this is pretty extreme, if that is the case. I'm surprised I'm even typing, let alone considering posting this.